Armie Hammer might not have left a string of traumatized women in his wake if he’d only sought professional help for his cannibal fantasies — in a dungeon.
A top Hollywood dominatrix tells Page Six that — though the actor is accused of crossing the line from fantasy to abuse — the desire to devour flesh is not an uncommon kink in the S&M world and can be channeled into safe, consensual activities before it goes too far.
“I’m actually surprised by how shocked everyone is by it, because it is a really common, normal — if any fetish is normal — fantasy,” said Jenny Nordbak, who has helped A-List actors and Tinseltown players safely explore their wildest fetishes. “I would expect any professional dominatrix to have seen it regularly.”
She believes such a kink usually boils down not to violence, or literally wanting to eat someone, but to a kind of “radical intimacy” and “the power and control [of someone being] willing to give up a part of themselves to you.”
Nordbak — author of the memoir “The Scarlett Letters” and host of “The Wicked Wallflowers Club” podcast — told us that she’s personally helped clients explore their cannibal kinks, and she’s seen it played out either verbally or as play-acting (think of the fabled sushi-eaten-off-a-stripper scenario, but with steak tartare-grade meat).
She added that, as with all kinks, “clearly communicated consent and boundaries” are important — and especially with something like cannibalism, which could be traumatizing. “Maybe the partner is OK with you talking about it in a really abstract way,” Nordbak says, “but they don’t [want] to hear about which rib you want to eat and what kind of barbecue sauce you want to use on it.”
She said of famous or powerful people, “There’s a power imbalance because you’re a famous person and they’re not, so they’re going to let you away with things that they wouldn’t let a normal person away with.”
Armie Hammer attends the 2018 Oscars, when his film “Call Me By Your Name” was nominated. WireImage
In fact, she says that working with one of the private dominatrices in Hollywood is almost certainly their safest option for a famous fantasizer.
“If you’re not going to do it with someone you’re in a relationship with and have built trust with, I think a professional would be a good way to go because then that power imbalance is neutralized because there’s an exchange of money and they’re choosing to do it.”
Plus, she says, they’ll be experienced with the theme — and probably better at helping the “cannibal” to live it out.
“It’s harder for a famous person with a potentially titillating fantasy, because they need to be that much more careful … it’s a calculated risk every time you bring it up with someone as a famous person,” she said.
Indulging with “a trusted professional or at a least in semi-serious relationship, you’re less likely to see it splashed across the Internet.”
Nordbak says some stars would even be better off finding a professional more private than the dungeon where she worked. (The A-lister who randomly booked an appointment to have her yank on strings attached to a certain piercing was probably taking too big a risk, she said.) “There are people who have a reputation for discretion,” she said, “and they’re happy to come to you.”
And not all fantasies need to be shared. “I have some fantasies that I’m not necessarily interested in exploring with a partner, but I can explore them through my imagination or through pornography and that’s fine and I feel fulfilled and it’s healthy,” said Nordbak. “So I think it kind of depends on the person and the fantasy, but I don’t think every fantasy must be acted out, for someone to feel fulfilled.”
Paige Lorenze is one of the women who has made accusations against Armie Hammer.
Hammer’s actions allegedly went beyond fantasy. He has been accused of abuse by women including ex Paige Lorenze, who told Page Six that the “Call Me By Your Name” star allegedly used a knife to mark her with the letter “A” near her vagina. Another ex, Courtney Vucekovich, made claims of emotional and sexual abuse against the actor.
Hammer has denied any wrongdoing toward any women, including Lorenze and Vucekovich.
“These assertions about Mr. Hammer are patently untrue. Any interactions with this person [Lorenze], or any partner of his, were completely consensual in that they were fully discussed, agreed upon, and mutually participatory,” his attorney has said in a statement. “The stories being perpetuated in the media are a misguided attempt to present a one-sided narrative with the goal of tarnishing Mr. Hammer’s reputation, and communications from the individuals involved prove that.”
————————
Originally published at https://pagesix.com/2021/02/23/hollywood-dominatrix-on-armie-hammer-leave-cannibal-kink-to-pros/ on .
